Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Randomize
