I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
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