random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
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