when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Randomize
