Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Randomize
