you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
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