i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
Randomize
