It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
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