He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Randomize
