Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
