there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
Randomize