how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
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