Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
Randomize