Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Randomize