And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
Randomize
