Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
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