I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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