I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize