we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
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