It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize
