her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
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