I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
