Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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