so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Randomize
