god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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