Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
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