I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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