is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
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