No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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