Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
Randomize
