Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
God gave him joint rollers for hands
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
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