so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
