dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
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