how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Randomize
