but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
