Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
i wish my penis had a tongue
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Panties = found
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
