It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
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