you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
You know, be my cock's hype man.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
25 People Reveal The Creepiest Kids They Went to School With
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
17 Subtle Body Language Signs That Reveal A Lot About Someone
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.