Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
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