Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
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