I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Randomize
