I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
