i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
What changed your mind?
Being sober
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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