That's intense
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Randomize
