yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Randomize