i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
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