He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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