News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
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