Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
We smell like vodka and hangover
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