is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
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